I want to share a big breakthrough I had last year and how it taught me so much about growth and evolving past fear.

(If you’re in business or a coach or expert who is helping clients to make transformations, then there are some valuable nuggets here…)

I’ve been a student of Dr Joe Dispenza,  and at his week-long workshops he has us do some type of physical challenge.

The point of the challenge is not for us to white-knuckle our way through it or provoke some big adrenaline rush, but in his words ‘to bump up against ourselves’. To get very intimate with the places where fear kicks in and then we stop ourselves. The challenge he gives us is an opportunity to master that fear and just take ONE more step.

take one more step

This resonated with me, because for years I’ve been telling my business clients, just get to the place you would normally stop and then just take one more step. Whether that is pressing ‘go live’ on a FB live, or ‘send’ on an email, or saying ‘let’s talk about that’ when your prospective client says ‘I can’t afford it’....

The bottom line is this. Anyone who has something that YOU want but don’t yet have isn’t that much different than you. They just found a way to keep going where you stopped yourself.

But talking is one thing and action is another. And as a former height phobic person I must admit to taking a big gulp when I saw his team practicing the challenge on this 40 ft rig.

facing-fear-joe-dispenza

By the time my team was due to take the challenge, I was more than willing. I wanted to complete it. But I honestly didn’t know if my body was on board with this course of action. And even though my logical brain ‘knew’ that what we were doing was totally safe, I wasn’t sure if my primal brain was going to go along with this activity.

Sure enough, I was not 6-feet up the ladder when my legs started to shake. I applied what Dr Joe had taught us. Take a deep breath, connect with my heart, let my body settle down, then take another step. Before I reached the top of the ladder my mind was already thinking ‘I can’t do this’. But I just kept applying the formula over and over until I got to the top.

Opportunity to Face Our Fears

Walking on the beam was a whole new challenge, up until this point I’d at least had the ladder to hold on to. Now I had to use my arms to balance. This was when my legs started to violently shake. I was judging myself and negatively comparing myself to the team-mates who had sailed through this part of the exercise. Later, my team-mates below told me they could see the moment I got connected with my heart again because the shaking instantly stopped.

The final part of the challenge was to take a leap of faith into the ‘unknown’. My team-mates were holding the ropes to support me, so this was an exercise in trust and surrender. I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to describe the satisfaction and joy I felt as I took that leap, shrieking with exhilaration as I did. (I love that in the photo my hand is still on my heart!)

bernadette-doyle-loving-yourself-through-fear
bernadette-doyle-joe-dispenza-fear


I’m celebrating 24 years of being in business in 2020. During this time, I have faced many fears, but most of the time my way of dealing with those fears was simply to push past them. And that takes its toll. I now have a better way, and this is to LOVE myself through fear. I wrote this post because I want to encourage you to do it this way too.

Loving Yourself Through Fear

If you are selling any type of transformation, then it is important that you know how to love yourself through fear. Because the truth is, as coaches and transformational experts, we can’t take our clients any further than we take ourselves. EVERY journey of transformation whether it is growing a business, moving into your dream home, sculpting your ideal body, starting a relationship, or anything else, requires facing our fears. The great news is, as you master it in one area, you can apply it to many other areas of your life.

As I was hugged by my team-mates back on the ground, I realised there is NOTHING I cannot do, because whatever it is, it is simply a matter of using this formula to navigate through and evolve past fear.

I hope I’ve inspired you to love yourself through a fear today, and if necessary, get the support you need to do it. If it relates to anything in business, then I’d love to help!